This weekend, The First Family of the Action Network™ , is headed to New York City for a Wild Card weekend watch party!
Well, the adults of this household are going. The kids will be at home with grandma, blissfully unaware of the degenerative nature of this trip.
When I close my eyes and dream of all the places I want to travel kid-free in the winter, my mind often settles on the crisp blue skies of … Hoboken, N.J.
I'm going specifically to hang out with the fine folks from the Action Network, make some hopefully above-average bets and silently stalk Sean Koerner from a dark … corner.
I’ve got dad jokes today.
As I was contemplating the best way to do that (make bets and party with my favorite people — not stalk Koerner because I am a perfectly competent creeper, thanks) I came up with the ultimate NFL playoff parlay with cocktails to pair.
Since the Action Network’s Wild Card watch party is at a bar, I don’t even have to make the drinks, either.
I get to sit back and sweat bets while the lovely bartenders at The Shepherd and the Knucklehead hook me up with these delicious drinks.
And while I COULD just bet these individually, I much prefer putting them all together into a parlay and having a night full of anxiety and regret.
So, I asked some of my favorite ladies from the Action Network to give me their favorite cocktails to pair with my top bets of the weekend, and here are the results.
NFL Picks and Cocktail Pairings
*NFL odds as of Friday afternoon
Steelers vs. Bills (Under 34)
This one is fairly obvious. The weather is going to be terrible in Buffalo with heavy snow, strong winds and below freezing temperatures.
In fact, this over/under has already dropped from 43 to 34, which may scare some off.
However, according to Action Labs' Bet Labs software, unders are 5-1 (83.3%) in NFL games played in winds of at least 10 mph where the total has dropped at least nine points (like Steelers vs. Bills) since 2003, covering by an average margin of 5.83 points.
I'm not scared, and if I was, I'm sure the cocktail below would help ease my anxiety.
My cocktail: Hot toddy
I love a good hot toddy, especially with this kind of weather.
The simplest way to make one includes:
- Hot water
- 1.5 ounces of Irish whiskey
- 1 tbsp. freshly-squeezed lemon juice
- 1 tbsp. of honey
- Cinnamon stick
Occasionally, I like to spruce it up with a flavored tea like chamomile or chai spice.
Mason Rudolph (14-1) Anytime Touchdown
This is my wild-card bet of Wild Card weekend.
Based on the latest Steelers vs. Bills weather forecast, I assume it will be easier to just run a quarterback sneak or "tush push" if Pittsburgh finds itself close to the goal line and needing to punch one into the end zone.
With 14-1 odds to boot, I love the potential.
Cocktail from Christina Ventura and Katie Richcreek: Tequila
No margarita, no paloma, no, no, no.
Just straight up tequila.
A terrifyingly accurate wild-card drink for this wild-card bet.
Packers (+7) at Cowboys
I would like to note that when I bet this, I got the hook at +7.5. However, I still like this at +7.
Analysis: The Cowboys are garbage and I will die on this hill.
More analysis: The Cowboys' wins this season came against the Giants, Jets, Patriots, Chargers, Rams, Giants, Panthers, Commanders, Seahawks, Eagles, Lions (was really a loss) and Commanders.
Lol.
Cocktail from Izzy Gomez: Bombay Sapphire or Tanqueray gin martini extra dry, shaken VERY well and either one or three olives, never two.
I swear this is what she told me.
She is my spirit animal and I want to be her when I grow up, even though she’s like 15 years younger than me. #GOALS
